I have one child. Currently, I am trying to work with him on games he can play by himself. We will not be having any more babies, so it’s crucial to his development and my sanity he learns to become self sufficient during playtime. There are many games that can be enjoyed by only one person. Not that kind of game either, he’s a toddler. Minds out of gutter, people.
1. Throw a ball up the stairs. This is one of his favorites. He throws the ball up the stairs, and it bounces back. Who needs a sibling when you have stairs? Almost every time you throw something round up the stairs, it will roll back. This is free entertainment for hours. My favorite part to “throwing-ball-up-the-stairs” game is the lack of noisemaker toys involved. My ears are splitting from a yellow school bus singing about how the wheels on the bus go round and round… and round… and round. I’m gonna bash that bus with a baseball bat. I hate that bus. The yellow bus is the spawn of Satan. A ball bouncing down the stairs is a choir of angels singing.
2. Put a slide in your house. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. Get a plastic outdoor slide, and put it in your living room. Best part of having your own personal slide and being an only child, NO LINES! An only child never has to share or wait his turn. It’s his slide. Bonus to slide, my butt fits on it. I have my own slide in my living room. So yes, we do try to teach him to share and wait his turn because it’s my living room and I bought the slide, my big booty butt is going first.
3. Stuff animal talks. When I was little, my stuffed animals talked. “How?” you ask. I used my imagination. I’m sure they’re still capable of doing that today; using their imaginations. You can get a stuffed animal pack and have wild adventures.
4. Reading. All kids should read. Reading is awesome. Read books. Teach your kids to read. Please for the love of humanity, TEACH YOUR KIDS TO READ! Don’t send them to school writing in text talk. “LOL” is not appropriate for writing papers. I sing the damn alphabet song a hundred times a day. I sing this because letters form words, words form sentences, sentences form paragraphs, paragraphs make pages. Pages can eventually become a book. See, reading is awesome. Let’s get our youth hooked on phonics, crack is whack.
5. Play food and kitchen. We spend a lot of our time cooking food my child doesn’t eat, but he loves play food. He will make it and bring it to you. You better pretend to eat his damn food even though he won’t touch your real food. He spends many quiet moments perfecting his fantastic fake plastic food. Pretend you love it. Truthfully, it’s rather bland and tastes like plastic.
6. DANCING. I dance by myself all the time. My best moves are never seen. Throw a vinyl on and let your child dance away their endless energy pit. They don’t need a partner or an audience, just give them a beat.
7. Cars. When I was a little girl, I loved “Hot Wheels.” My son loves miniature cars. He can occupy himself for about an hour by going “VROOOOOM” and running cars all over the house.
He also has a bus, have I told you how I hate the yellow bus? It sings when it moves. It needs to be buried. He plays with the bus the most. He doesn’t make the “VROOOOM” sound when he plays with the bus. The stupid yellow bus has it’s own songs, ones about how it’s wheels go round. Sometimes, the possessed bus demon toy plays a song when no one is touching it. The bus has it out for me. It’s either me or that bus.