Smack In The Face Day

I had a bad day yesterday. Like one of those days where you get smacked in the face and I mean literally. Woke up to a realization. Some people may claim to be friends but really they are not my friends. Felt hurt over realization. My true best friend saw my placenta. She is a real friend, text her to say I love you and tell her I am grateful she is in my life. Go to work. Computer at work was not feeling the idea of work.  My solutions to most computer problems are:

So I pull the plug and start all over again after punching computer in the face (not really, I can’t do that, I don’t own this computer.) Go about my day. Finish work. Start process of giving son bath. Get son out of bath, fight to put diaper on, and then I pick him up. He proceeds to smack me in the face because he couldn’t reach his blanket in the next room. He was angry and didn’t have words to express himself. His best way to express upset emotion is to smack Mommy in the face. I use my best judgement and decided to rely on a Super Nanny method. Sat him down immediately. Get eye level. Make eye contact and say “We don’t hit. Hitting hurts. We hug. We don’t hit.” I use my best firm voice.  Next, I get this face from him:

This is toddler speak for:

 Take it in stride. He has to learn not to hit. Note to self, we will have to work on not hitting. Another note to self, he also must learn to not bite. Worried about him biting and hitting other kids. Can’t worry, must read “Goodnight Moon.”

Finish “Goodnight Moon,” sing bedtime songs. Tell him even though Mommy is upset because he hit her, she still loves him. Kiss goodnight. Go downstairs, check home computer. EBay buyer does not want to pay. Tell her it’s okay but an unpaid item case has been opened. Don’t bid on things you don’t want. She calls me several bad words which include “douchebag,” she follows with a derogatory slang word used towards gay people accompanied by “little b!%tch.” Chalk that experience up to the fact she was not raised with good manners. 

Next, call Mom. Mommy makes everything better. Sometimes, a grown up 33 year old still needs her Mommy. Go to bed. Wake up to a new and better day. 

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